"Parentality"

Yeah--it's not really a word, yet.  But you may have noticed that I tend to do that fairly frequently: use sensible non-words to more precisely convey my intent.  Guess you can decide for yourself how to process the etymology. . . maybe it's a slick combo for "parental" + "mentality", or could be "parent" + "reality."   Or, possibly--logically-- it's simply the noun that names the honorable position of being a parent, and deciding how to deal with all the emotions, questions, doubts, and wonderings that accompany this noble state. Makes no difference which etymological theory you choose adherence to, my musings on our current condition of "parentality" are thus recorded for your enlightenment, amusement, information, boredom. . . you choose.

Well, the six-ish weeks that Princess was home--of course--seemed to fly by and she needed to board the train for her return on New Year's Day.  And son was home for just three weeks before we drove him back on the first weekend of the year.  So, it's only been a few weeks that we've been back to the "empty" status of our current lives.  Vibrant, bustling, home-filled togetherness to quiet, comfortable "just-the-two-of-us"-ness in nothing flat: almost gives a guy head rush!

And in this zooming, vacuum-ous state of mind, I am constantly wondering.  Ranging from the pseudo-philosophical, to the parentally logical, to the ridiculously sentimental--and the whole windy road between. . .

• Why does their "at home" time pass at a multiply accelerated rate compared to the "away" time?
• When will I feel that the quiet and emptiness is the comfortable norm?
• Does the "need" to know all that I can about what's going on for them each day ever abate?
• How about that touch of "panic" when I realize that their "growing up, at home" days are essentially finished, and it's too late to remedy it if I've failed in teaching them what they "need-to-know" for life? 
• How come no one's yet invented a way to digitally transport needed hugs?
• Why are the borders between "stalker-ish hyper-involvement" and "allow-them-their-independence" and "figure-it-out-for-yourself, honey" so oblique and wavery?
• When is it okay to change the condition of their unoccupied bedroom?
• Will they really think to dress warm enough for the very cold, wintry conditions they have now and again?
• Are their roommates really unaffected by them staying up with the lights on for most of the night?
• Is there anyone there for them to REALLY listen and care about their brilliant ideas, random creative thoughts, and personal ponderances?
• Is it ironically selfish that I enjoy that fixing dinner seems easier now that their opinions don't need to be considered, yet, I still worry if they are remembering to take the time to eat, and hope they are making basically healthy choices?
• Who picks up their dirty clothes from the bathroom floor?
• How come I don't find myself accomplishing so much more since they are not home to occupy time with?
• Did we spend the right amount of time on the right things in their growing up so that they have a proper and beneficial perspective, and grounding memories and traditions to develop from?  
• Is he apprehensive about what his future holds after graduation this spring, or just relieved to take a break from classes for awhile and excited about the possibilities?
• Will she officially declare "English" as her major this spring term?
• Will I always experience the throat-constricted pangs of the "lonesome" moments and the heart-jumping, "can't-catch-my-breath" response to seeing there is email from them? 
• How can their college experience be so radically different than mine?  It's only 30 years. . .
• Is "coming home" a cozy, familiar, relaxing pleasantry for them, or an obligatory, freedom-infringing, intrusive sentence to be endured?
• Where will they eventually end up with their job?  And can we get cheap, convenient travel there? 
• Finally, do their friends, acquaintances, and professors truly comprehend and appreciate the amazing, brilliant, creative and caring individuals they are?

And, so, we ponder the perpetuity of our parentality.  Any experiential advice, answers, awarenesses, or comments are very welcomed.  Blessings to you all--parents and kids too!